LIVEBLOG: Dean's Date, Fall 2012

UPC'S THE INK PRESENTS: THE ORIGINAL DEAN'S DATE LIVEBLOG

Got Dean's Date sightings? Tips? Late-night snack locations? Drop us a line at pressclb@princeton.edu

5:10 PM - typing, fingers frozen, kettle corn stained.

I believe it was TS Eliot who said, "This is the way [Dean's Date] ends. Not with a bang but a whimper."

Thus, our tired and tireless news group has fizzled and popped. Our only solace at the end of this 24-stint is, well, this guy:

That said, with over 3,400 views (edit: not counting the 2,400 directed from our homepage* correction for LZ and the Twitterverse), we at The Ink are proud to say that this Dean's Date has been amazingly fruitful (in the procrastination department).

DEAN'S DATE, WE WILL MEET AGAIN.

-VC

2:24 PM - Bloomberg Study Lounge

No time for citations? Some pro-tips from the pros (i.e. not me):

1) Type in the name of your article/book to Google Scholar, click the cite button, and voila! Good for MLA, Chicago, APA, etc. Also imports to other citations managers.

2) easybib.com

-JW

1:05 PM - Reddit

"Selling books back like a true college student":

 File this under Post-Dean's Date/Finals tips for buyback shipping.

-VC

12:36 PM - McGraw, delirious

If only my Dean's Date essay was half as good as this...-NDS 11:39 AM - printing stalledYes, EL, still not enough baby things.-VC11:27 AM - printing clusterVC has pointed out there are not enough babies (human or otherwise) on this blog. Too much Rick Ross and G-Unit and not enough cuteness.Me as I’m re-reading my draft:Me trying to climb out of Dean’s Date despair:Me and copies of my draft in 6 (!!!) hours:-EL11:20 AM - bed, no shameTHROWBACK UPDATE: Earlier we posted a 2006 video of a group of Princeton students who made the "P-Unit" Generic Rap Song that, with 130,000 Youtube views, seems to have done pretty well for itself. Where are they now?Turns out, one is running a web metrics firm in Philly. The other is an aerospace engineer. (So yes, they've done well for themselves too.)See? Stuff like this doesn't have to come back to haunt you.h/t Brett Tomlinson, who interviewed Rob Moore and Nate Domingue for the PAW about this song way back when John Kerry was still a thing.-VC11:02 AM - 4th Floor LauritzenJust in case you need some extra motivation to get you through the day, check out this (admittedly low-quality) clip of Princeton’s Dylan Ward of the Men’s Squash Team clinching yesterday’s 5-4 win over Harvard. The Women’s Team similarly won 5-4. To quote Steve Harrington, of the Princeton Men’s Team: “It was one of the best moments of my sports career. I played some of the best squash of my whole life." Carry this energy with you through to your assignments.

-CRM10:37 AM - Witherspoon's6.5 hours to go, everyone. Which makes it probably too late for this public service announcement from a friendly politics major getting a caffeine refill, but just in case:“The deans are actually pretty lenient about giving extensions when you have multiple papers due the same day. I mean, it’s not like they want you taking five exams in a single day, right? The one at my residential college said they hardly get any requests…I wish I’d known that as a freshman.”ME TOO. Cue flood of fervent pleas for a few more hours.-LZ10:31 AM - Printing Clusters (!)Because we made it this far with only one baby animal:

-VC7:55 AM - WilcoxThe dining halls are now open for breakfast. Wilcox, in particular, has a wide selection of bagels.– AJS6:50 AM - ButlerStarbucks is open! The sun might be up soon! Life begins anew! It's a brand new day! Here's a timeline of what's hip and happening this morning.

• 7:00 AM – Frist Food Gallery opens
• 7:00 AM – PJ's Pancake House opens
• 7:30 AM – Dining halls open.
• 7:45 AM – Chancellor Green Café opens.
• 8:00 AM – U-Store opens
• 8:00 AM – Witherspoon’s (in Frist) opens
• 9:00 AM – C-Store opens

– AJS

6:20 AM - Somewhere South of Sanity

DON'T FALL ASLEEP YET!

- AJS

3:45 AM - WilsonAs we get into the wee hours of the night, my mind starts doing random things. Like making Dean's Date parodies of Portal (nerd-alert) songs.Namely the last verse/refrain(s):

Look at us livebloggingwhen there's papers to doWhen we look around, it makes us glad we're with youI'm gonna need a Wa runThere is Dean's Date to be doneFor the people who are still awake.And believe us we are still awake.It's 4am and we're still awake.Hey Prox, you see us and we're still awake.Our brains are crying, but we're still awake.And when you're sleeping we'll be still awake.STILL AWAKE.

STILL AWAKE. (also, craving some cake.)-VC3:30 AM - PattonPublic Service Announcement - 10 hours to go, so BACK UP YOUR WORK. Dropbox, email papers to yourself, pull out those USB sticks, whatever.-SG3:14 AM - Rocky Dining HallIt's past 3:00. Your coffee and chocolate aren't helping anymore. Neither is your 5 hour energy. What to do? Play a game!We recognize the names to all the well-known buildings on campus: Joline Hall, Forbes College, McCosh Hall. But do we know the man (or woman) behind the name whose building we use daily? Unless you're a Princeton history freak (and not in the tour guide kind of way. I love the backwards walking -- real talent), you probably don't.So here's the game! Match each building or residential college with the picture of its namesake. I'll bet you can't do it. Oh yes, you just got dared.Answers will be hidden under Nixon (You can't miss him, just look for the nose).Pictures:Buildings:Joline Hall. Named after Adrian Joline '70, the 1800 kind. A lawyer, railroad executive, and author, he graduated from the University while it was still called the College of New Jersey (just for the record, it didn't became Princeton until 1896). It was donated by his wife, Mary E. L. Joline, after his death.Rockefeller College. Named after John D. Rockefeller III '29. A grandson of the original John (Standard Oil) Rockefeller, he had more money than even an ORFE student thinks he'll make on Wall Street. He was a large philanthropist and was on the University's board of directors.Bloomberg Hall. Named after Emma B. Bloomberg '01. She's the daughter of the mayor of New York and graduated with a degree in English and a certificate in Medieval Studies.Forbes College. Named after Malcolm S. Forbes, Jr. '70. He is the editor-in-chief of Forbes Magazine and has run for the Republican presidential nomination twice. He prefers to be called “Steve.”McCosh Hall. Named after James McCosh. He was a philosopher and president of the University from 1868-1888. His friends said that he was all around, a very cool guy.Mathey College. Named after Dean Mathey '12. Described Alexander Leitch in A Princeton Companion as "one of the most devoted, energetic, and generous supporters of the University in modern times." He is the Dean in Dean's Date. Not really, but that would be funny.- ONF2:44 AM - DodWe did a little more Firestone adventuring before being unceremoniously thrown out for the night. If you go to the third floor and walk all the way to the back, past the African American studies reading room, there’s a narrow staircase leading up into the tower. Go up, past the little-used fourth floor until you can go no higher, and take a closer look at the windowsill. This seems to be Firestone’s designated graffiti zone, and though most of it’s pretty harmless – initials and class years, the symbol for pi, “TOM” inscribed in a winged heart – take a closer look at the lower right corner.It’s a lonely place this time of night, and come to think of it, a little eerie. Who knows who might be lurking in the labyrinthine stacks, peering between the shelves, lying in wait? Maybe it’s just as well you’ve been sent back home to your cozy dorm study room for the night. Hopefully you managed to snag some of the Frist nachos along the way.-LZ1:55 AM - 2006Serious throwback here from Princeton students circa '06, parodying a generic rap song (wait, did I just see twerkin' at 1:51?! Are you telling me twerkin' wasn't invented in 2012?!) :Next task to find out: WHERE ARE THEY NOW?-VC1:25 AM - Firestone Balcony Redux

Earlier tonight, we posted some famous writers' sustenance of choice. Here's what Hunter S. Thompson needed to get ready to write. Hopefully, your night isn't too "bumpy."

— AJS1:10 AM - The InnAfter getting kicked out of Marquand I spent the walk back to Forbes listening to the melodious howls and w(h)ails coming from the ROMA area and Whitman. Whitman seemed more spirited but ROMA had a nice harmony going. All I can say is I wish we still did this. You know a tradition must be good if it's too reckless for the roaring '20s.

Poler's Recess a ten-minute break in cramming for exams, was a Princeton custom noisily observed from the turn of the century almost up to the Second World War. The recess occurred every night during the final examination period. As soon as the nine o'clock bell began to ring, all windows on campus were opened and... Firecrackers were exploded, pistols, revolvers, and shotguns fired with blank cartridges, horns blown, drums and tin pans beaten.

- JR1:03 AM - ForbesWe’re now officially past 1 a.m., and there’s nothing like a little Ryan Gosling to cheer you up at this hour. For your viewing pleasure (in case you missed these posters around campus from the Women’s Center):-DB12:20 AM - Locked outBUT WE HAVE TIGER SNUGGIES. (courtesy WH '13)-VC12:07 AM - Murray Dodge, first floorTea with occasional cookies from downstairs. Dean's Date craziness can't get much calmer than at MDC.h/t HR '13 on this gif.-AGRK12:05 AM - Shower

Following a tip from LL '15 and a mean hunch, we navigated deep into the  bowels of Firestone to find a luxurious shower. Helped along the way by a riddle ("...in a wood-paneled oasis amidst a sea of blue / you'll find a shower inside a loo") we finally found the shower. If you're looking to get a little steamy, it's on the B-Level.

- AJS & LC

11:33 PM - Frist GalleryThey're everywhere! A little song of encouragement from the Dean's Date fairies.-LZ11:20 PM - FirestoneDean's Date fairies, more welcome than the band:-LC10:50 PM - Band Saw : Coming to a study space near youFrist Campus Center:Firestone Library:Consider this your warning.- LC & AJS 10: 45 PM - FristThere's kind of a resemblance. Kind of.

Answers to Building Namesake Game:A) BloombergB) JolineC) ForbesD) MatheyE) McCoshF) Rocky- ONF10:34 PM - Happy placeIf you, like me, have concerned and loving parents who, three years in, remain lovingly concerned about your mental/physical condition in the days leading up to Dean's Date, and text you periodically to check in, and are also probably reading this liveblog, and if you, like me, are contributing to a liveblog that chronicles the very deterioration of your mental/physical condition, then maybe, instead of responding to their texts, you decide to respond publicly on said liveblog.So here is the most recent text from my dad. "Are u eating well? Take care of your health."And here is my public response: "I'm doing great! Today I chewed through an entire pack of Strawberry Orbit. I forgot to eat breakfast, but at dinner I savored a cold slice of pizza and small pile of sprouts and shredded beets doused in balsamic vinegar.  A few minutes ago I ate three potato chips and accidentally swigged the last few sips of someone else's backwash-y jasmine tea. Right now I'm nursing a liter of seltzer. All told, a nutritious and balanced diet. I'm doing great!"-GN10:05 PM - Preppin' for Midnight BreakfastCome midnight, campus will erupt into a cacophony of Dean's Date Screams. What began as one res col tradition has spread across campus, and now we've got several versions for everyone everywhere:

• Holder Howl (Rocky/Mathey)
• Whitman W(h)ail
• Forbes Freak-Out
• Wilson War-Cry

No confirmed Butler version yet, but our team is rooting for it to be called "Butler Bawl." Or "Butler Bellow." Or "Butler Brouhaha."

For those NOT in residential colleges, why not try your own:

• Pyne Panic
• Cuyler Cry
• Scully Screech
• Spelman Spaz
• Dod Disturbing the Peace
• Lockhart Lament
• "Foulke This Sh*t"

-VC

9:35 PM - Procrastination Nation

We're 4 hours in. You're craving a little bit of procrastination, but that feisty little competitive streak in you doesn't want the random girl next to you to see that you're slacking on facebook. Have no fear, with hardlyworkin, you can look productive AND indulge in some friendly stalking! This site converts your facebook or twitter feeds into a spreadsheet. Bizarre? Definitely. Worth it? Probably Not.Will you try it anyways? Yes. 

-BP9:18 PM - CJLAs a break from all the fun stuff that one does on Dean's Date Eve, many freshmen are selecting their preferences for the glorious adventure known as the Spring writing seminar. Fortunately for them, there's help! In hopes of selecting good writing sems, freshmen with Spring classes asked for those who took it in the Fall to put together a Google Doc of recommendations. Kindly, they obliged. Good teamwork, right? All the kindergarten teachers would be so proud.In case any seniors have forgotten what a writing seminar is, the Princeton website gives a very cheerful explanation: “Centered first and foremost on writing, and taught by scholars with special training in the teaching of writing, the Writing Seminars are dedicated to helping students build a solid foundation for their work at Princeton.” Sound familiar?The recommendations chart has the usual: which classes have hard papers, which ones have boring reading material, and, of course, which professors hand out A’s (or C’s) like candy. However, some people took this recommendation responsibility very seriously.A sampling of the shiny frosh pearls of wisdom:“[RON] IS A BRO TAKE HIS CLASS HE'S AMAZING”“Professor [McGonagall] is a lot to handle. While the class IS very interesting, she's kinda bat shit crazy sometimes.”“Whackkkk - trust me on this”“Professor is nice; that's about the only good thing that can be said.”“She's awesome!!!”These guys really enjoyed their classes:“Avoid whatever this man teaches like the f***ing plague.”“Avoid at all costs. You were warned… she loves to pick favorites and, if you are not one, then enjoy your writing purgatory. Again, you were warned.”Oddly enough, this guy’s comments on his class were more positive than most others: “Professor [Dumbledore] is a good guy… Not sure if I would recommend it, but probably not the worst sem choice.”Sarcasm or just low expectations?: “Take this class, you totally won't hate your life and want to kill yourself every time you have to do a paper.”And my personal favorite: “Take this if you hate yourself.”Maybe that last one is just a double dog dare masochist style? Only the adventurous '16er will discover the truth.-ONF9:07 PM - ForbesKeep swimming, Princeton! But please note that water and laptops do not mix. Be glad this isn't you:-DB8:54 PM -- MarquandA Tale of Carrel Vandalization (h/t TC '14):

Productivity hit a devastating low this afternoon when I discovered my roommates (PA '14 and RL '14) took it upon themselves to plaster a carrel I had been using in Marquand Library with dozens (hundreds?) of xeroxed photos of Rick Ross.  Reasons why remain unclear.

Some of the more clever arrangements included the shirtless, menacingly toothy "growl" Ross from under the book I had come by to grab, the pensive glasses-wearing "study-buddy" Ross, and my personal favorite, the "peek-a-boo" Ross from within the neck of a sweater I kept folded in the drawer.

The understandably confused administration of Marquand Library sent the following message to the professor whose carrel I had been using, who promptly--and, thankfully, in good-natured humor--asked whether I had anything to do with the escapade.  You'll find my response.

Still waiting to hear back on whether I will be allowed back into my library of choice. Until then, I'd like to use this forum to state the need for concerned members of this campus to gather and demand permission to bring beverages into Marquand.

 -VC8:34 PM -- Frist LoungeNeed some decent music to vibe with this Dean’s Date eve? One ultra-productive Forbesian has reportedly taken over a Woody Woo conference room and is currently blasting healthy doses of Korn and Chief Keef on his way to writing a full four pages of his Politics paper:“Gang violence and racial slurs really get me into the academic mindset”I have no doubt the other manically stressed studiers in Robertson agree.-JR8:33 PM – Firestone balcony As dining halls close and dinnertime draws to an end Princeton students will look towards other sources for nourishment throughout the night. The Wa, U-Store, C-Store, and Studio 34 will each be at our disposal in the next 24-hours. But before reaching for another Red Bull, consider channeling a few tips from some people who really knew what they were doing to fuel the writing of your papers.Princeton’s own F. Scott Fitzgerald swears by apples and canned meat from the tin (what can only be a habit formed during desperate Dean’s Date drafting).Nothing like a lime Popsicle to add some zest whilst editing.- LC

8:16 PM - Whitman Study Lounge

Feeling miserable about your paper? There’s nothing like a parody of Les Mis to cheer you up. Presenting some Dean’s Date awesomeness written by Amy Zhou ’13 and edited by Tara Ohrtman ’13:

Do you hear the students type? Typing away all through the night?

It is the typing of a class whose students don't know what to write!

When the page count of your work matches the prof's expected sums,

There is the paper that you'll hand in when Dean's Date comes!

Will you join in our late night? Who will procrastinate with me?

Within your drafts, is there a thesis worth more than a C?

Then join in the plight that will earn you your Princeton degree!

Do you hear the students type? Typing away all through the night?

It is the typing of a class whose students don't know what to write!

When the page count of your work matches the prof's expected sums,

There is the paper that you'll hand in when Dean's Date comes!

Will you write all you can write in an unending B.S. trance?

Some will P, some D, some F; will you submit and take your chance?

The sources and readings will (hopefully) back up your stance!

Do you hear the students type? Typing away all through the night?

It is the typing of a class whose students don't know what to write!

When the page count of your work matches the prof's expected sums,

There is the paper that you'll hand in when Dean's Date comes!

-EL

8:15 - General languor in ButlerShirley Tilghman's weather machine is affecting hook-up culture amongst black squirrels in the Orange Bubble. There's a string of supremely boring tropes of Princeton life, plucked right out of a daily newspaper's op-eds. Here's another one: senior year cynicism and apathy. But I really feel it right now, and acutely. Each successive Dean's Date seems to further inure me to stress, to the heart palpatitions that come, inevitably, every time, either caffeine- or stress-induced or both. But they're nowhere in sight. It's 8:15 and I still await their onset. My brow's unfurrowed and my palms unclammy. Waiting for the fevered adrenaline to kick in, but, who knows, maybe it won't, after all I'm a senior, I've done this six times before, I feel so old when I go to the Street, I've barely done anything on my thesis, et al. - GN7:43 PM - D-FloorIf you cannot work in the presence of any human interaction, there are other options besides your room. Firestone, for instance, has entire floors that can be of service.While many students think the library bottoms out (both physically and emotionally) at the C-Floor, another level lies below it. Behold the mythical D-Floor. Accessible by a single stairwell and a door that was unintentionally left unlocked, the D-Floor is not to be confused with the dance floor. It’s a cramped storage room, but at least you won’t hear the band from here.

-AJS7:39 PM - Frist 2^nd Floor HallwayCurious about which lucky Princetonians have nabbed classrooms in Frist on this fateful evening? Apparently, all you ladies out there, we’re missing out on the “Women’s Ultimate Study Hall” in one of the second-floor classrooms. Either that, or the Women’s Ultimate Frisbee team really knows how to motivate its players.-DB7:07 PM - TwitterverseTHIS JUST IN: Joyce Carol Oates (Princeton Creative Writing Prof, prolific writer, most common adjective used to describe her: "waifish") TWEETS. I REPEAT. Joyce Carol Oates USES TWITTER.

Some of the best tweets of JCO (or J'Oates, as I prefer to call her):One for Dean's Date:And sometimes, she retweets Mike Tyson:-VC6:16 PM - Dod, but leaving soon for sustenanceOur night is young. The road to Dean's Date completion stretches long and wide before us. What you need now is skillful preparation. Informed decision-making. Careful priming for the battle ahead. Survival comes to those who persevere, not to the hasty or rash.What you need is our Dean's Date dinner selection nutrition guide. Whether you're relishing a final hour of procrastination in the dining halls, venturing all way out to Prospect or surviving off a stockpile of late meal goods in your room, we at UPC have researched the best foods to stimulate your writing and sustain you through the long night ahead.According to the WHO and a bunch of food/writing hack blogs, the best brain foods come packed with antioxidants and/or omega-3 fatty acids, which can be found especially in dark chocolate, nuts, seeds and fish. Other foods for productivity boosts are blueberries, raw carrots, whole grains and avocados. Green tea is also a win.We'll see you after dinner.-- AYS5:53 PM - Campus ClubAdditional motivation to get 'er done comes in the related, SECOND PROTIP: YOUR WRITING WILL HELP YOU GET IN TOUCH WITH YOUR INNER MAN/WOMAN/DOGSpecifically, the Gender Genie uses your writing to predict your true gender (we'll let you judge reliability for yourself). Best result so far: "dog." Try to beat it. We dare you. h/t KM- ASG5:00 PM - NGE '14's RCA futonFor six consecutive semesters (that's right, count 'em, six), the University Press Club members have slaved away every Dean's Date to give you 24 hours of non-stop solidarity, schadenfreude, and shameless stress-induced self-indulgence. While our anonymous poster troll (yes, real interview; we don't just make things up) finds a perverse sense of camaraderie in the self-destructive self-pity of Dean's Date, we find an excellent opportunity to interpret Latin graffiti.There will be distractions.There will be caffeine counters.There will be baby animal pictures, Hey Princeton!'s, midnight screams, loud band music, candy-giving fairies, delirium, challenges accepted and--hopefully, inevitably--papers written and turned in.Follow along as we chronicle Princeton's (and our own) descent into the madness of the Date of the Dean.FIRST PROTIP: BULLSH*T DETECTION METER

Just paste your essay into this site and it'll calculate how much pretentious B.S. is in it! (Note: depending on your course subject, a high score may be a good indicator of essay quality. See: philosophy major.)-VC