Coincidence? I think not.
No, Mr. Newman, it is no coincidence: Drunk kids do stupid things. And on this fine Newman's Day, let us sober ones enjoy the hijinks. For instance:An obviously drunk upperclassman stumbles into the bathroom wearing a backpack from which clinking can be heard. He stands at the urinal and, after a minute, a loud breaking sound pierces the silence.After around ten seconds of more silence, the drunk student grumbles: "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck."